Ramadan Realization.

Today is the start of Ramadan, and I'm not feeling good. Not really because of the fast, just the thoughts I've been having.

My little sister will graduate high school in May with a 3.7 GPA. That's genuinely good, but I graduated with a 4.0, the darn salutorian of my class, and my family just told me I did a "good job". I have to travel back during spring break for her graduation party.

I was on lockdown for the smallest things back in high school. If my friends wanted to watch a movie with me, I had to beg with every fiber of my being to go with them, and the average response was just "go study". My little sister practically went out every damn day.

I was once caught talking to a girl. Nothing sexual about it, just a basic conversation. The fact that I had her name saved on my phone was irrefutable proof that I was fucking her I guess, and I got beat bad. The Somali girl my mom's forcing me to talk to only sends one word responses to anything I say.

She was caught sending nudes to a boy, and she got her phone back after three days.

THREE FLIPPING DAYS.

I really think that a lot of new people that will eventually find this sub reddit are going to be people like me. People who spent every waking moment of their life studying because of their parents expectations will be here. I'm going to end up with a shifty life, a shifty girl who doesn't give a fuck bout me since we're from the same place, a shitty job (my parents are "encouraging" me to drop out of art school). I'm gonna stop fighting it. Makes me more tired.