Anyone else here with a dead mom?

My mom died almost 10 years ago, when I was 27.

I’m pregnant right now with my first (only 9w).

Was just thinking about her today and how much she loved me and how much she loved being a mother. And how my grief will shift, emerge, re-emerge, morph, etc. throughout this process.

I would literally do anything to just see her one more time.

I’ve already been through the experience of getting married and realizing she will never have met my husband. But it’s funny, I’ve always felt like they know each other anyway (side note: My mom had medium abilities, and so does my husband. Not sure how much I believe in it but I believe they have some connection to spirits and energies).

I wonder if I will feel like she knows my child too.

I grew up with dead grandparents on my dad’s side, and while I just accepted it as normal as a kid, it makes me sad now. I feel a huge hole in my life where they would have been.

I’m sad my child will be missing a grandmother, who was the most wonderful person.

Anyway, just looking to connect with other motherless daughters who are mothers-to-be. Would love to hear your thoughts, experiences, feelings.