The dumbest most stupidest betrayal

My family of 5 commited to not spending money on Friday for the blackout. Please lets skip the debate on how insignificant this choice is or isn't or if you're loving how government and politics is in the states right now.

At least I thought he'd agreed to it. But today I find out he ate lunch out and ordered groceries from Walmart. And then minimized it and justified it. 🤷🏻‍♀️

Now here I sit feeling really stupid all over again. I feel betrayed again?!??

I'm looking back to reevaluate and did he utter the words that he'd commit to not spend? No, actually he didn't. Was he just silent and I took that as agreement? I guess I did! Is he whole person with own beliefs separate from mine, yes of course. But he let me think he was supporting me. And he wasn't. Or didn't want. Or maybe even took the opportunity to prove that he doesn't give a fuck about me.

So now the triggered bad thoughts are fired up in my brain again: -I'm stupid and naive. -I can't trust him to just be honest with me -He doesn't give a flying fuck about me -He's selfish and only cares about himself

And the new questions... is he scared of me??? He can't just fucking talk about his feelings or thoughts to me?!?! Am I such a big scary monster that he had to scurry in the shadows ffs?

🤢😭