Self care and mental health (long term relationship)

I’ve had two long term relationships. One at 19 and one at 23. Both had been debilitating. The one at nineteen I was trying to still find myself. As one who was all ready medicated for ADHD, it was a fight with in myself to handle self care. Even on the medication I struggled with time management. Being that I had just started college I fourth heavier insomnia than I had ever. Staying asleep was the worst. It only progressed when I got with Remington (first ex).

Remington; a nice person. He was really the first person to give me the attention of a romantic relationship. It was so much so that with in two weeks I had met his family. They all fell in love with me and then on his birthday, I met one of his brothers. This sibling had fraternal twins. They too loved me. I noticed at this point that I was super distanced from my ‘friends’ and family. Which was leading to declining friendships and self care tasks. It might take me days to feel like I needed to shower. The cleanliness of my side of the dorm was horrible. Mentally I had to will myself to do laundry, dishes and clean.

This was normal until I was put into a situation of tug of war. We had another friend who claimed he asked me out. I was being ‘foughtover’. I had no clue about finch.

It wasn’t until I moved home almost a year into the next relationship I had begun to see ads for this app.

Ryan, an okay person. He was dealing with mental health himself. Before I moved in with him we’d gone on one date. His relationships hadn’t lasted more than like maybe eight months. I at least had of almost 11.5 months under my belt. He also had a rougher childhood. He definitely had unmedicated mental health problems. He had a camaro, as soon as it got warm enough he had it out. The issue with this was I had to start covering like 80% of the other bills and I was already doing like all of the laundry, cooking, dishes, and groceries too. I wax making like $10 an hour paid every two weeks. Before he lost his job he was making like $21 an hour paid weekly.

I was medicated for anxiety and depression when I moved in with him. He was already a messy person, no schedules. I at least had schedules and was trying to use my meds. I came home with like 900 dollars to my name. I forgot to mention we both signed on a 2014 jeep Cherokee. I was not taking my meds and if I did I was doing it on empty stomach off caffeine. Unmediated Anxiety and depression is horrible. My adhd and autism was minimized by the caffeine.

I was going to work under medicated and depressed/anxious. It was showing in my lack of work ethic. I got back to my meds and a routine once he got his own apartment in my parents town.

I found this app and I immediately joined finch and this community. My life has been coming back together since.