No diagnosis without parental input? I’m an adult, this feels crazy! 😭

After months of run-around with my primary care physician (who gave me gems like “your procrastination issues sound like a moral failing”), I’ve finally got a date on the books for an evaluation with the appropriate ADHD-specific psych clinic. Heck yeah!

The problem? They’ve made it super clear in all the information sent about my upcoming appointment that without input from a parent, no diagnosis will be considered. I’m 37 and on shaky terms with my parents. Today I had the guts to bring up the appointment/my concerns about lifelong symptoms- my mom physically recoiled then laughed at the possibility that I could have ADHD. She in no uncertain terms thinks I’m crazy for even suggesting it.

I was considered the “easy kid” compared to my brother; no one ever clocked that I was struggling because I managed to pull it together in public/got good enough grades to avoid red flags. Even if I could convince her to speak with the psychiatrist, she doesn’t believe her “easy kid” could have an executive functioning problem.

Where do I go from here? I’m expected to show up to the appointment with a parent available to take a phone call about childhood symptoms. Would it be best to reach out ahead of the appointment and explain the situation? Wait until the meeting to explain that my parents won’t be cooperative? Pretend they were injured in a tragic jet-skiing accident and can’t come to the phone right now?!

I’m feeing defeated before even stepping through the door. Anyone else successfully share childhood symptoms without a live action witness to back you up?

UPDATE-

Thank you to everyone who has replied, I promise I’m reading them all! ❤️

I was able to find the OG email sent by the clinic. Here are some of the instructions:

-You must have an adult informant who knew you as a child available either in person or by phone for this appointment to provide evidence of childhood symptoms as per DSM-5 criteria.

-Often it’s best if they are a parent or guardian, grand parent or aunt/uncle, etc.

-School records including any IEP (Individualized Education Plan) and/or 504 Plan are also acceptable.

-In order to expedite diagnosis and treatment, please have an adult informant available for your diagnostic interview.

-Please note that evidence of childhood symptoms is part of current diagnostic standards and practice criteria for ADHD.

It’s looking grim guys 🤦🏻‍♀️