How did you cope pre-transition?

Pre-transition mtf here. Have been on a “cleanse” for the last 3 weeks after coming out to my wife and us discussing whether or not my desire to be a woman is a sexual kink or a deeper part of my identity. I have stopped crossdressing, stop engaging with my online female identity, and stopped looking at any fetishized “transformation” content (in addition to stopping masturbation generally, due to the fact that I have kind of built an arousal “template” around my desire to be female).

Stopping these things has not been incredibly difficult. The hardest was probably throwing away my feminine clothes. But what has been incredibly difficult is that now I am left alone with my thoughts with no ability to “cope”. I still have the same desires and wishes to be female but now they just kind of “sit” in my mind and I am unable to compartmentalize like I have previously.

So it just got me thinking: for folks who have transitioned - what if any “coping” mechanisms did you have, either consciously or subconsciously, in the years leading up to your decision to be true to yourself and transition?