F*ck Porn

Alright, before I start, I just want to say this is my first post on this sub, or on Reddit ever. So sorry if this is shitty

I remember during Covid in 5th grade, I was typing "babes" and looking at pictures of hot girls and somehow, I don't really remember how, that made me discover a porn website that I still use to this day (sadly). It was one of the big ones, 'xvideos' and at the start, I was confused at what I was watching, but I was nonetheless in a hypnotized state watching two people have sex. My PMO phase didn't start until 3 months later, where I saw a girl giving a guy a handjob, so I recreated it with myself. This was the start of my demise, because after that day, I masturbated everyday, 3 times a day. I remember one day, I was watching YouTube on my TV when my mom wasn't home in seventh grade, and I saw a video '7 HABITS THAT WILL CHANGE YOUR LIFE' by Hamza. Now, this isn't supposed to be a praising Hamza post, because I'm still struggling to quit. He's the one that made me go to the gym near the end of seventh grade, but I quit for some reason. I still have my gym membership though. But, I saw all these good habits that I thought could change my life, and this got me into 'nofap' by seeing his channel and countless other self improvement YouTubers talking about the same thing, Nofap. I saw the negatives of porn and saw them in myself, I realize that porn could be the reason why I was and still am, not who I desire to be. I started masturbsting less and watching porn less, instead of doing it three times a day, I'd last for a week, try to last longer, but fail. But that was still progress for me. I then had a Barmitzvah in date, and I swore by after my Barmitzvah I would quit porn forever. Guess what? I didn't. Willpower doesn't work, I heard this before, but not realizing it into now. Willpower is useless without a plan. In eighth grade, I had no female attraction whatsoever, I didn't talk to any girls at all. I remember during tennis season, I would purposely jerk off a week before a tennis match so I would get that testosterone boost during the game. But I see that I was just making an excuse to watch porn back then. Anyways, fast forward to 9th grade, where I'm still in and almost done with. At the start of the year, like a week before the tennis season ended. I was doing nofap and taking cold showers, and I got female attraction. But I failed, and started masturbating and staying late to jerk off until 11:40pm-12:00am. I lost that attraction, and I hated it. So now, I'm planning tomorrow, to go back on my streak, take cold showers no matter the discomfort, when I get an urge to jerk off, I do something physical, I sleep when I'm supposed to, and do weightlifting like I used to at the gym. No matter what new porn stars I hear, like the up and coming 'Sophie Rain' or anybody else like her, I won't look into them. I know I'll have ups and downs, but I know I got this, I know all of us got this. I gave up before, but I swear on my life, I'll never give up again, and you shouldn't to.

Thanks for reading my post lol