Did I just meet a covert narcissist?

When we first got together, I thought he was a reliable, honest, and kind person. He seemed low-key, mature, and like he had his own sense of values. But over time, I realized he wasn’t who I thought he was.

1.  While we were dating, I found out he was using dating apps (Grindr) to talk to other people. He even posted about it on his Instagram story, knowing I could see it. I can’t rule out the possibility that he did this on purpose to get a reaction.

2.  When I confronted him about it, he refused to address it and just said, “Whatever, do what you want.” Then he flipped it on me, saying, “If you’re looking for an excuse to dump me, then whatever.” This was a complete 180 from how he acted before when he seemed devoted to me.

3.  He often ignored my messages, sometimes disappearing for two days and then coming back like nothing happened. Once, after I expressed my worries and concerns, he literally responded with, “Wow, you sound so pathetic.”

4.  He swings between deep insecurity and arrogance. Sometimes he talks about how he’s not good at anything and hates his body, and no matter how much I reassure him, nothing helps. Other times, he acts like he’s a rare catch—super attractive and someone a lot of people would want.

5.  His attitude toward his family is inconsistent. Sometimes he expresses concern about his dad’s drinking problem and his mom’s health. Other times, he acts like he doesn’t care about them at all.

6.  He constantly needed emotional support from me, but whenever I needed support from him, he would avoid it.

7.  In the beginning, he was very sweet and affectionate. He told me things like, “You’re perfect,” and “I want to be with you forever.”

8.  He said all his exes and former partners “abandoned” him. He frequently used phrases like, “We were meant to meet by fate,” and “You really understand me.”

9.  He engaged in what seemed like triangulation. He would bring up his exes often while we were together. For example, when I asked how much his tattoo cost, instead of saying he didn’t know, he said, “I don’t know, let me ask my ex.” Even if he genuinely didn’t remember, was there any need to involve his ex?

I feel like I was completely misled. Has anyone else dealt with something like this? Does this sound like covert narcissism, or am I overthinking it?