Dating your spouse is a thing, right?

TLDR; I’d like my husband to initiate and plan dates more however he says he can’t due to him “not knowing how”.

Tonight we were talking about Valentine’s Day plans on the phone while he’s away at work. For context, anytime we do something; movies, restaurants, going out, etc. I’m always the one to plan it and initiate it. So I asked him if he could do the planning for Valentine’s Day and he started with excuses of I wouldn’t like what he plans and he doesn’t know how… naturally I got upset. When we ended the call, I texted him expressing my feelings and he says I’m starting an argument and being toxic. I feel like he’s gaslighting me because he has been married before as well as dated other women. He also always shuts down when I express my feelings about his lack of initiative to be romantic or plan dates.

I’ve included screenshots of some of our conversation just to provide more insight.

Any advice on how to approach this with him? I want to be courted and dated even after marriage.