I need some advice, from a feminist perspective, on how to stop being so disturbed by the fact that my boyfriend likes gross misogynistic rap music.

Hi everyone, I really need the help of this sub on this.

So my boyfriend is progressive, he’s a feminist, he’s an LGBTQ+ ally and he’s overall great. But I really really hate the music he listens to. He’s a big fan of rap, and the majority of the songs he listens to are completely disgusting and degrading, the kind that call women sluts and whores and just really dehumanise them.

This is really disturbing to me. I’m obviously not going to break up with him over this when everything else is great, that would be silly, and of course I can’t tell him what to listen to. I just need some advice on how to be OK with this.

I personally can’t stand listening to such misogynistic songs. Before I met my boyfriend, I used to think that only misogynists liked those songs. Not I no longer believe that, but I still can’t help feeling upset and hurt by the fact that my boyfriend listens to this music, because I genuinely can’t understand how someone who respects women can voluntarily listen to it.

People in real life tell me that it’s no big deal, but they are not the biggest feminists, which is why I need the opinion of this sub. In this post, I don’t mean to offend anyone who likes this kind of music, in fact if you are a feminist who does like it, I’d appreciate it if you told me how you can be OK with these songs as a feminist, I’d like to understand the mindset behind it better. I’d also appreciate any input on this, including any tips on how to overcome this problem. Thank you!