Boyfriend isn’t getting divorced

UPDATE: This was…. Eye opening. I have gone through as many comments as possible but can’t reply to everything. Please know that I see them and everything is taken on board. To those of you who can’t believe I would have even entertained this to start with, I was 19 and head over heels in love for the first time ever. I chose to believe a promise that never materialised and didn’t stand strong enough in my boundaries to make him take my feelings seriously. To those of you telling me just to walk away, this is the father of my youngest and the man my eldest calls dad, of course I don’t WANT to walk away, I wanted advice on how to approach this situation or idk maybe I just wanted to vent and have someone tell me I was right in how I felt! When I say he worships me, it truly feels that way. He bathes me when I’ve had a long day, makes a big deal of all anniversaries/birthdays etc, fresh flowers every week, chocolates when I’m sad, words of affirmation, unwavering support. We have built a life and maybe I was naive to start it, but we owe it to our children to save it.

In the morning I am going to get serious with him about this topic. He has a month to do what he needs to do in terms of his divorce or he can move out. I have been patient. I have been understanding. I have been kind. I deserve to feel like the priority. Thank you all for your advice, I will update here again when I have spoken to him.

UPDATE 2: The relevant documents needed to initiate the divorce and begin proceedings have been purchased and are ready to be posted. Crazy what finding out people online think you’re an asshole can do for your motivation.

My boyfriend and I have been together for over 5 years. When we met he had been separated from his wife for around 12 months and had a 2 year old son. I was told that he would be divorced within a year however that year came and went and, though frustrated, I gave him grace because divorce is messy and expensive.

Fast forward and we have now completely blended our families, had a daughter together, share finances and live together. I am still waiting on this divorce. I thought we had made some headway when mid 2024 the process began; he is now at a point where he needs to send some documents off to reach the next step. 8 months have passed. He hasn’t done it. He is still. Not. Divorced.

I am tired of begging. I’m tired of wanting him to do it, I want him to want it! His wife has done nothing but cause trouble, treat my terribly and make our lives difficult. I want that chapter shut. Why doesn’t he?

• EDIT TO ADD

This man and his ex do not get on. He worships the ground I walk on and tells me every day how loved and beautiful I am. I feel like we’re stuck in this weird limbo where all I can think about is the fact that he is still married and it overshadows all the good