Jack of all trades, master of none

I need to know if other women experience this. My life is a cycle of intense interest and hyper focus, followed by complete burnout. Since becoming a SAHM, my struggles with energy regulation are on full display.

I struggle to approach things with a natural progression, allowing for small failures and gradual improvement. Instead, I dive in headfirst, spending hours researching to get everything perfect the first time. But when that fixation fades, I feel incapable of even basic tasks.

I scored 99th percentile on the PSAT, then poor-average on the SAT because I lost interest. In college I had to get a medical exemption to expunge my first set of grades because I could not force myself to go to class. A few years later, I went back to nursing school, graduated with honors, and quickly moved into leadership roles. Then hit a breaking point because I couldn’t stand to be away from my baby. I was the go-to neuro stroke expert, but I also backed into my husband’s car one morning while leaving for work. I consistently struggled with time management and losing my badge.

I excel at everything for a time. Then suddenly, I cannot bring myself to brush my teeth, call my doctor, or socialize.

This past year, I have started a cottage bakery for sourdough, aligned to teach BLS and ACLS, taken a writing course, and launched a medical writing business. But before any of them could really succeed, I stopped everything. I am trying to detach my self worth from productivity, to be okay with simple days that calm my nervous system. But that made me realize how not okay I am most of the time. Please tell me I’m not alone?